Wine for Speaking with Conviction

I have noticed something that happens in the class when we do our wine tastings: the men declare, the women ask.

As I may have already mentioned, when we taste a wine in class, we discuss three aspects of the wine: the sight, the nose (smell) and the palate (taste and mouth feel). Two people in class discuss each wine; one person describing sight and nose, and the second person discussing the palate. We go through each wine this way, moving person to person through the rows of seats.

What I noticed is that all the guys in the class state their observations directly and confidently ("I get raspberry, plum, tobacco, smoke and mushroom."), even if they're wrong. The women on the other hand, end every deduction with a question mark ("Um, I think it's medium alcohol? With plums? coffee? Medium acid?"), even when they're right.

Why do we do this? I was doing it too until I noticed the pattern and forced myself to stop. Actually, no, you know what, that's not true. Now that I remember, it was the guy who sits in front of me who basically said to me when I finished one of my descriptions that I knew more than I thought I did, and that I should be more confident in my delivery. He wasn't being obnoxious; he said it more in a "You can do it!" kind of way, but it bothered me that I was doing that and hadn't even noticed, and that I, in the end, needed a man to point it out to me.

Was it that I needed permission to be bold? Are we as women so much more afraid of making mistakes than men? Are we somehow give a subliminal message that we don't know anything, whereas men are given the message that they do? Am I being too simplistic and making sweeping generalizations?! Probably. It just really bothers and upsets me that all the women in the class are questioning themselves so much, probably without being aware of it. I was afraid of being wrong, and then being embarrassed in front of the class, which is ridiculous because we are all learning and are all making mistakes.

I have been making a concerted effort now to be bold in my descriptions in class; to not end any of my sentences with question marks, and to not proceed as if I am somehow ashamed of what I am saying. And you know what, an interesting thing has been happening: I feel more confident and positive while I am speaking. I feel more certain of what I am saying, and I care less if I am wrong. Speaking in a confident and secure manner has, in fact, actually made me feel more confident and secure. It is impressive, this power of speech, of the voice, of expression. I studied this very thing for years at Shakespeare & Company, but I sort of forgot about the power of the voice until now.

So let's celebrate speaking out and being bold with a Rolf Binder Shiraz "Heyson" Barossa 2006. This Australian Shiraz has a wonderful nose of blackberry jam, black raspberry, chocolate-covered blueberries smoke and figs with tobacco, dark chocolate, coffee grounds, blueberry and blackberry on the palate. It is wonderfully complex, smooth, full and round. No questions asked.